When it comes to raising and disciplining children, there are as many opinions and so-called parenting experts as there are children. Despite all the warnings and criticism, four out of five parents still spank their kids while most so-called experts preach that spanking is always harmful, that the negative consequences of spanking outweigh any behavior benefits. Who’s right? How can you separate fact from fiction when it comes to successful and fruitful child raising? We’ll discuss this on today’s episode of Ask Dr. Walt.

From 2021-2022, I was honored to host a TV show on LiftableTV, “Ask Dr. Walt.”

When it comes to raising and disciplining children, there are as many opinions and so-called parenting experts as there are children. Despite all the warnings and criticism, four out of five parents still spank their kids while most so-called experts preach that spanking is always harmful, that the negative consequences of spanking outweigh any behavior benefits. Who’s right? How can you separate fact from fiction when it comes to successful and fruitful child raising? We’ll discuss this on this edition of Ask Dr. Walt.

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Disclaimer: The Ask Dr. Walt show is designed for entertainment purposes to give information on various medical conditions, treatments, and procedures for your personal knowledge and to help you be a more informed consumer of medical and health services.

SHOW TRANSCRIPT

SHOW 29

How to Discipline Your Child

Guest: Den Trumbull, MD

TEASE:

When it comes to raising and disciplining children, there are as many opinions and so-called parenting experts as there are children. Despite all the warnings and criticism, four out of five parents still spank their kids while most so-called experts preach that spanking is always harmful, that the negative consequences of spanking outweigh any behavior benefits. Who’s right? How can you separate fact from fiction when it comes to successful and fruitful child raising? We’ll discuss this on today’s episode of Ask Dr. Walt.

OPEN:

Hi, everyone. I’m family physician Dr. Walt Larimore and I’m happy you’re joining me today for what I hope will be a useful discussion for those who love children, especially those who are or will be parents. So, here are the questions parents are faced with: Do I discipline my child or not? Should I be my child’s friend or coach? Do we spank our child or not? These are some of the most common parenting questions, especially for young parents. But the topic of discipling a child charges emotions and often sparks controversy. The problem is there’s not an easy answer. To help us navigate these controversies is Den Trumbull, MD, who received his bachelor’s degree from the University of Florida, his medical degree from the University of Miami School of Medicine, and completed his pediatric residency at the University of Alabama Children’s Hospital. After serving in the United States Air Force for four years, Dr. Trumbull entered private pediatric practice in Montgomery, Alabama. Dr. Trumbull was a Fellow of the American Academy of Pediatrics for 22 years until 2003 when he resigned to help create the American College of Pediatricians. He has written, or helped write, several Position Statements for the College. His primary area of interest is behavioral pediatrics and has written a new parenting book, Loving By Leading. Den has practiced pediatrics for over 34 years, has been married to Nancy 34 years, and they have five adult children and four grandchildren. Den, welcome to Ask Dr. Walt

QUESTIONS OR TOPICS:

• First of all, what was your beef with the American Academy of Pediatrics and what is the American College of Pediatricians?
• Let’s start with discipline. When it comes to parenting, what is the meaning of “discipline?” Not correction, but training to produce character.
• Does a child really need discipline?
• What does the Bible say about child discipline?
• Parents today are commonly told that corrective discipline is not necessary; that correction is old school. Modern-day “positive parenting” says parents should exclusively persuade their child to behave with incentives, not frank correction.
• Discuss the nature of a child. You say a child is “Not born pure, but innately self-focused.” Explain that.
• You write, “Children actually want to be led, and are more secure when they are. When parents require proper behavior, it is eventually acquired by the child.” This brings up the question some parents have about whether they should follow their child or lead their child?
• Den, you say, “Parents must not have expectations of a child beyond his or her developmental capabilities.” Explain that.
• I like where you write that “A balanced approach is key to success with discipline.” You emphasize, (1) Instruction: Children can’t know what is proper without instruction. (2) Affirmation: which is often overlooked in the busyness of life, and (3) Correction: which must be age appropriate.
• There’s an ongoing debate about spanking. Let’s start with this: what’s the difference between corporeal punishment and appropriate spanking?
• What is “appropriate” spanking and what is “inappropriate” spanking?
• What type of parent should never spank a child?
• Let’s finish with this: you say, “Within a healthy relationship, parents must invest time in the relationship.” I’ve always said that quality time can only occur in the middle of quantity time. In other words, you cannot create quality time in short spurts. Would you agree?
• Gosh, we didn’t even get to the various parenting styles and how they affect the total health of our children. Would you be willing to come back and explain that to our viewers?

THANK DEN.

Dr. Trumbull’s latest book, Loving by Leading is available at most online bookstores. In addition, you can read more about parenting highly healthy children in a couple of my books, God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Child and God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. You can find on my website, www.DrWalt.com. Just go to DrWalt.com and click on the books tab.

Also, if you have concerns about your or your family’s health that you’d like me to consider in future programs, just drop me an email at AskDrWalt@LiftableTV.com. One warning, I cannot answer specific questions about your individual health, but I bet you have plenty of great general questions to ask me, so send them in to AskDrWalt@LiftableTV.com, and we’ll get to as many as we can during future programs.

Until our next visit, let’s get moving together toward true health, and “Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.”

Disclaimer: The “Ask Dr. Walt” show is designed for entertainment purposes to give information on various medical conditions, treatments, and procedures for your personal knowledge and to help you be a more informed consumer of medical and health services.

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© Copyright WLL, INC. 2023. This blog provides healthcare tips and advice that you can trust about a wide variety of general health information only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment from your regular physician. If you are concerned about your health, take what you learn from this blog and meet with your personal doctor to discuss your concerns.